Office Life

Interesting Resume Quotes
Usually resumes are about putting your best foot forward. Many times I’ve seen people end up with that foot in their mouth. Here is a sample of what I’ve seen:

“Actively recruited by IBM”
Yes, you graduated in the year 2000. You and every other engineer with a pulse was actively recruited by IBM.

“Designed and built security robot capable of detecting, following and tranquilizing intruders”
Should I be worried for my personal security during an interview?

“Good with women”
When you hear something like this, it begs a reference check. After talking with a woman who went to school with him, no woman in the school shared that opinion.

“Superior Intellect”
Not much to say about that one.

Marketing
Marketing is much more difficult than it looks if you wish to do a professional job. Here are some notable quotes from marketing:

We were having a discussion on the packaging of a disposable product. Engineering was arguing that the product packaging could easily be made re-usable, to which marketing responded, “The packaging is so stunning that people will keep them around so that they can look at them.”

“I used to go into meetings for entertainment purposes.”

“I want words to enter our dialog”

“If you’re not at the show, even if there are no leads, you gottta go.”

Sales
Sales can be a tough slough. There are some real gems of sales people out there, but many of them are far and few. Here were some interesting sales quotes:

“Joe gave us a head nod, which from him means alot. We are discussing how to discuss it.”

“She winked at me in the meeting, that is how I know that we will be selected as the vendor.”

Engineering
Engineering says and does just as much stupid stuff as the rest of the organization. Here is some of that proof:

“We seem to have a pretty good rate of running people into the ground, hopefully the next guy will be able to take it.”